My Celeb Obsession

If you've ever met me, even just briefly, you are probably aware of my ::ahem:: appreciation of reality tv, "celebrities" and celeb gossip. It's probably border-line unhealthy, but it keeps me young and hip (are the kids still saying "hip" these days? Maybe I should have said "groovy"?).

One of my guiltiest pleasures is the Real Housewives series on Bravo. It truly is a hot mess of a show, full of the most ridiculous drama ever. If the message boards for these shows weren't full of people who are hot messes themselves, I would probably join one just to discuss the drama in all it's hot, messy glory.

If you ever happen to appear on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire (or maybe another show that's still relevant to today's culture, like Cash Cab [which I am DYING to go try to get on]), you should totally use me as your Phone-A-Friend for any celeb questions you might have. Just trust me on this. It's scary how much I know.

I truly get sad when I find out any celeb couple has broken up.* I don't care if I knew they were doomed from the start. I think I just really want to believe that a Hollywood marriage can last. When Reese and Ryan broke up, I was really sad. When Jen and Brad broke up, I almost shed a tear. If Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson ever break up, I will lose all hope in celeb marriages.
* The exception to this rule is Heidi and Spencer. I wish they would have never even met each other because, as ridiculous as they are apart, they are even worse together. And that's saying something.

But something I truly despise about Hollywood is all the speculation about weight and who is too skinny or too fat. I sometimes feel bad for the women in Hollywood because they have so much pressure on them to be in amazing shape all the time. And the old cliche about the camera adding 10 lbs is true (which is the only reason I look so large and in charge in my belly pics towards the end of my pregnancy). If you've ever talked to someone who has met a celeb in real life, one of the first things they'll say is, "She's way skinnier in person."

I especially feel for the pregnant celebs. Tabloids and paparazzi (is it bad that I can't say that word anymore without cuing Lady Gaga in my head?) are constantly speculating about their bellies, even before they announce they're pregnant. So if they happened to have a large lunch, the paps are selling pics of them to the National Enquirer, who then splashes the pics on their covers under some ridiculous headline like, "Angie's pregnant again! Sources say the daddy is Barack Obama!"

This insanity leads to these poor women having a ridiculous idea of what they should look like when they're pregnant. (And don't even get me started on how fast most celebs "slim down" after they have their babies.) Take one of my favorite Housewives, Bethenny Frankel (of New York fame), for example. Here she is, 7 months pregnant:

Please give me a break. The only thing about her that looks pregnant are her boobs. Here's a picture of me approximately 7 months pregnant (not like I should be the standard, but for the sake of comparison):

I guess it's pretty easy to lose the "baby weight" if the only weight you gained during pregnancy was that of the actual baby. I found that picture of Bethenny on some gossip site, and there was a forum for comments below it, and of course everyone was like, "She looks great for seven months pregnant! She's so awesome. Gold star for Bethenny." I don't know why my feathers are so ruffled about this, but I guess I just hate the implication that to look "great" during pregnancy, you should barely look pregnant. If you looked quickly at the picture above, you might just think it's a weirdly distorted picture of her toned abs.

I'm not saying that pregnant women have to balloon up like the Michelin Man, but if you're pregnant it's ok to actually LOOK pregnant. Do you hear that, "celebrities" everywhere? It's ok to gain weight when you're growing a human. Believe me, that baby you're gestating wants you to eat. If you don't eat, they don't eat!

One celeb I appreciate is Kendra (Wilkinson) Baskett. I know that term should be used loosely with her, because really, what is she famous for? But I have to give her serious props for being open and honest about her pregnancy weight gain (as in, she actually gained some). And since her adorable baby was born, she has had to work her butt off to lose it. So thanks, Kendra, for being a normal person. I like that about you.

I know the next time I get pregnant, I will not let myself go completely off the deep end with the eating like I did with L (famous last words). But I'm certainly not going to be following the Hollywood-prescribed method of barely eating during pregnancy and working out at insane levels. I will flaunt my bump with pride. And if the baby wants curly fries from Arby's, who am I to say no?